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6 Rules for the Proper Care of your Web Developer

by Ford Saeks

Anyone who has ever seen the IT Crowd knows that we computer nerds are a sensitive breed, and we web developers have our own peculiar brand of eccentricity.

After all, we speak multiple languages of basic gibberish and spend hours arguing over esoteric things.

How does the general public deal with us, the mysterious nerds? Well, when it comes to getting the best out of your developer, there are a few simple rules you should follow: 

  1. Do not disturb before noon. Most developers are night owls, not morning people. Sure, give us an energy drink/coffee/caffeine gum and we’ll work, but we’re still going to be grumpy.

  2. Please speak mainly in sarcasm. Besides HTML/CSS and PHP, it’s our primary language.

  3. Do not expose your developer directly to sunlight. Most developers have spent years perfecting their translucent skin derived from all-day coding sessions; don’t try and make us less pasty.bacon-graphic

  4. We all love bacon. Please send us piles of bacon for best possible coding.

  5. We also really like sugar. Coat that bacon pile with sugary goodness, please.

  6. Provide us with caffeine. OK, this was part of Rule 1, but one cannot overstate how important any form of caffeine is for the proper care of your web developer.

Sure, not all web developers are made the same. Some of us even get away from a computer for a couple hours a day. Some like comic books and others might even appear normal to the uninformed observer. But if you follow the six rules above, you’ll find your web developer is happier, “healthier”, and coding like a machine. They might even have shinier hair, though that result is still in beta testing.

This public service announcement is approved by Ford Saeks who loves his web developers and is currently at the store purchasing bacon, candy and caffeine. He would like to remind you to take care of your web development team and please share with us any other insights you have on keeping them happy below. Thank you!

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